It’s me. Hi. I’m a full-time stepmom, it’s me.
My stepchildren are with me and my husband 💯 of the time. My bio-child is with us 70% of the time and that is how our blended family operates. My heart has grown in ways I didn’t know were possible and I’m forever grateful for my husband and our kids.
Our blended family journey began 5 years ago and we’ve been through some stuff ➡️ 😳😬😭🤷🏻♀️🤪🤦🏻♀️😂😍
To those of you going through blended family “stuff”, I feel you. I’ve learned a lot the last 5 years and while I wouldn’t trade my family for the world, there are a few things I wish I’d learned sooner.
My takeaways after 5 court cases:
1. Document everything. No really, EVERYTHING. Screenshots have been my best friend.
2. Get yourself a really good attorney. They are worth every penny and will save you time and money in the long run. If you live in PDX and need a recommendation dm me.
3. When someone shows you who they are, believe them! Expect that a high conflict individual will remain high conflict and don’t fall into the manipulation trap.
4. Just when you think there can’t possibly be another “wtf” moment, what do you know, there it is.
5. Focus on the good and don’t let the latest e-mail or court battle consume you.
6. Lean on your partner, your family and your friends as needed. You don’t have to be everything to everyone all the time.
7. Let the kids be kids. Shield them from as much as you can but always lead with honesty. They don’t need to know every sordid detail but untruths should be corrected.
Every blended family situation is different. What’s worked for me, may not work for you.
If you’re struggling, I hope you reach out to someone you trust for support ❤️.